One of the most excruciating problems that has plagued Planet Earth for the past 25 years is a phenomenon known as "S.P.L.A.T.T.E.R.". The location of this problem is within the interior surfaces of the omnipresent household microwave, and it is caused by radiation's unprecedented level of kinetic energy disrupting the "peaceful" nature of TV dinners and assorted foods. The French call it "Shrapnelle". This growing problem is an endemic that is more common than Herpes Simplex 1. The prognosis is not good for the world. Whenever possible, discard your old microwave and buy a new one.
-C & Out
December 4, 2009